A crowd of Bricklynites looked skyward this afternoon as the Bricklyn Rail Transport Agency’s (BRTA) monorail service began operations, looping around South Bricklyn’s downtown core. Besides providing public transit to this growing commercial and residential area, the kilometer long monorail line avoids creating ground-level congestion.
Engineer and Federal Council member Bill B. Butler, aka “3B.” Bricklyn Eagle archive photo.
South Bricklyn Federal Council representative Bill B. Butler — who also works as a railroad engineer for Bricklyn’s Union Pacific rail line — applauded the inauguration of the monorail.
Butler explained that the Bricklyn Loop Monorail is based on that of the world-renowned Wuppertal, Germany, suspended monorail (“Schwebebahn”) system that has operated since 1901. As Butler noted, “for implementation in a LEGO city such as South Bricklyn, the BRTA monorail drew on the work of the talented LEGO design and engineering firm, JC Brickworks.”
Here’s a short video of the Bricklyn Loop Monorail in operation.
Disney Monorail. From Wikipedia.
According to Stephen Plater Mills, CEO of the BRTA, “the BRTA decided on constructing a suspended system, as used in Wuppertal, Germany, rather than a Disney-like monorail system.” As Mills noted, “the Wuppertal system has proven itself for more than a century with its suspended carriage design.”
Bricklyn Loop Monorail passing in front of the Railyard Jazz Club before arriving at Southside Loop Station.Wuppertal, Germany, suspended monorail (the Schwebebahn). Photo from Wikipedia.
Homer Simpson seen loitering by the Southside Monorail Station last week while the monorail was doing test runs. FYI, note the giant-size donuts Homer is carrying. Dave Tiler Broffman, CEO of Dunk Them Donuts, has just come out with these mega donuts, in an effort to redirect Bricklynites crowding into the newly opened Pastries by Patsy café back to Broffman’s Dunk Them Donuts shops. Photo by Bricklyn Eagle reporter David Plater Blue.
But, as Mills explained, “unlike the Springfield monorail, with its flimsy construction and untested solar-power design, our monorail has been carefully engineered and rigorously tested. With its dynamic motor, solid plastic construction, and state of the art remote WiFi controls, the Bricklyn Loop Monorail will provide Bricklynites with years of safe and convenient service.” As to Simpson, Mills declared, “keep him loaded with those mega donuts and he won’t cause any monorail mischief.”
See our Reader Responses to this article, including a Response & Video Questioning BRTA’s Safety Claims
Asked about future plans, Mills told us that “If the initial South Bricklyn loop proves successful, phase 2 will extend the line through the Great Wall of Bricklyn. As Mills noted, “this will allow connectivity with key locations, including Bricklyn University, the Bricklyn Medical Center, and BIA (Bricklyn International Airport).”
Mills did acknowledge that Outland visitors to Bricklyn would be unable to view this portion of an expanded monorail system, as it would run on the other side of the Great Wall. However, as Bricklyn Eagle readers know, Bricklyn’s top scientists have been looking into potential workarounds that someday would allow visitors to see those portions of the Realm currently blocked off by the Great Wall.
In the meantime, Bricklynites and tourists alike can enjoy a safe, quiet, and comfortable ride, while enjoying scenic views of Lake Bricklyn and South Bricklyn’s downtown buildings.✥
Excerpt from The Simpsons episode “Marge vs. the Monorail.” includes the classic closing line: “Donuts. Is there anything they can’t do.” Notably, the episode was written by Conan O’Brien, and includes the appearance of Leonard Nimoy. Also noteworthy, the role of solar power and its consequences for the monorail!For links to the full episode.
See our Reader Responses to this article, including a Response & Video Questioning BRTA’s Safety Claims
by Gloria Vanderbrick, People in the News Correspondent.
Patsy Brickerson — the real Outland Patsy’s avatar — is behind the counter. Lovers of French come by on Thursdays to chat. According to Patsy, plans are in the works to offer French classes for members of the Bricklyn business community at Patsy’s during evening hours when the bakery would ordinarily be closed. Photo by DALL-E3, with prompts from Gloria Vanderbrick.
Pastries by Patsy has become a favorite of not just francophone residents and visitors, but also of your more donut-loving “traditional” Bricklynite. While having some morning pastries last week at Patsy’s, I took a photo of the busy scene. Next time you’re downtown, be sure to stop in at Patsy’s.
Editor’s note: Here’s the original story we posted about the bakery’s opening.
October 26, 2023
by Gloria Vanderbrick, People in the News Correspondent.
A huge crowd of Bricklynites came to celebrate the opening of “Pastries by Patsy” in front of the Southeast Corner Building downtown today.
A crowd gathered outside the Southeast Corner Building, now the ground floor home of Pastries by Patsy. Speakers holding croissants at the opening day ceremonies included, from left to right: Bill Tiler French of the Bricklyn Alliance Française; Tom Brickorti, CEO of the Bricklyn Chamber of Commerce; Patsy Brickerson, avatar of the real Patsy; and Hilma Plater-Zybrick, President of the Federal Council.
The new store replaces a pizza shop, and adds a touch of “le français au centre-ville,” as Bill Tiler French, board member of Bricklyn’s chapter of The Alliance Française, put it.
Photo of the real Patsy on opening day of her café. Because of privacy concerns, any Outlander in Bricklyn (including Outlanders who own businesses in Bricklyn), must have their images digitally altered.
The real Patsy was in attendance for the festivities, along with her Bricklyn avatar, Patsy Brickerson. The real Patsy was thrilled, but stunned, by the number of Bricklynites cheering on her new café.
“C’est incroyable de voir autant d’habitants de Bricklyn ici aujourd’hui. Nous allons faire de notre mieux pour élargir la variété des pâtisseries disponibles, et nous aurons aussi notre propre version des beignets de Bricklyn!”
Michel Tiler Brioche, rumored to be under consideration for the position of sous-chef at Patsy’s. Some say he looks a lot like the Muppets’ “Swedish Chef”?
Et la vraie Patsy d’ajouter : “Je vais aussi avoir besoin d’embaucher un sous-chef très rapidement.”
Translation: “Its incredible to see so many Bricklynites here today. We’re going to do our best to expand the variety of pastries available, and will also have our own special take on Bricklyn’s time-honored donuts.” As the real Patsy added, “I’m also going to need to hire a sous-chef very quickly.”
📍Editor’s Note: Bricklyn’s Avatar Law requires that any Outland business owner must have an avatar representing them in Bricklyn, and can only employ citizens of Bricklyn in their business.
The Bricklyn Eagle’s original March 10, 2023 news story about Pastries by Patsy and interview of the real Patsy follows below:
➤ In light of the resolution of the “Great Donut Debate,” we were especially excited to learn that Patsy, a Burlington VT Outlander, will be opening a French-style bakery / café downtown. Gloria Vanderbrick, our “People in the News” correspondent, interviewed Patsy to learn more about her plans.
Bricklyn Eagle: What got you interested in opening up a bakery in downtown Bricklyn, and will this be your first foray into operating a bakery?
Patsy: I have been operating the bakery as a home-based business in the Outland city of Burlington, VT, for many years. When a prime location opened up in the desirable and nearby Inland community of Bricklyn, I seized the opportunity.
Pastries by Patsy will be on the ground floor (by the brown canopy) of the historic Southeast Corner Building, also home to the Bricklyn Natural History Museum on the second floor, and around the corner from the new Space Flight Park.
Bricklyn Eagle: We’ve heard your bakery will be replacing the pizza shop in the historic Southeast Corner Building. What appealed to you about that location?
Patsy: My realtor, a certain Mr. xxxxxx (who, I might add, received a considerable commission on the transaction!) convinced me that this is the perfect location for my bakery, being near transit and on the bike-pedestrian pathway.
It’s also immediately below the Bricklyn Natural History Museum, which I heard is a very popular attraction.
Making the deal even better, I was able to purchase the pizza shop’s ovens, which are in very good condition, at a quite reasonable price.
Sal Brickfour, owner of the now closed PizzaBrick shop, showing Patsy Brickerson the inside kitchen layout of what will soon be Pastries by Patsy.
Note: As required by Bricklyn’s “Avatar” law, all Outland persons owning businesses in Bricklyn must be represented by an “avatar minifigure” — so here, the real Outland Patsy is represented by her Bricklyn avatar, Patsy Brickerson. For reasons of privacy and security, only a very few Bricklyn officials in the Office of Consular Affairs are aware of the actual identity of the Outland owner / operator of a Bricklyn business.
I should add that Mr. Tim Brickedy of the Bricklyn zoning and planning office was very helpful in facilitating the permitting process.
Bricklyn Eagle: Will you be offering sit-down service inside, and/or on your patio?
Patsy: We will have seating for 12 indoors, where patrons can watch the baking in process, and additional seating for 12 on the patio, with views of the Bricklyn bike and ped path, looking out towards the historic, tree-lined Northside Square neighborhood.
Bricklyn Eagle: Can you give us a preview of your menu, and tell our readers what they have to look forward to?
Patsy: Here is a copy of our menu, which I think will whet everyone’s appetite. You will notice that the menu includes beignets au cidre de pomme to please doughnut-loving Bricklynites!
📍Note: Patsy’s spelling of donuts as “doughnuts” indicates her north-of-the-border Canadian roots.
Patsy: Initially I was insulted and deeply wounded. However, Walt Brickman apologized and wrote a beautiful ode to croissants. It is the most beautiful poem I have ever read! I have accepted Mr. Brickman’s apology, and I am confident that he will learn to appreciate the true beauty of French pastries when he visits Pastries by Patsy.
Bricklyn Eagle: We have heard that you are a member of your home region’s chapter of the Alliance Française. Members of the Bricklyn chapter have told me they are looking forward to meeting you. Is there anything you’d like to share with our readers about the role an Alliance Française can play in fostering French-oriented businesses?
Patsy: Did you know that the Alliance Française has generously offered to teach Bricklyn business owners and their employees how to speak French and use the subjunctive mood correctly? The classes will be held at Pastries by Patsy.
Bricklyn Eagle: Finally, as you know there are many passionate donut lovers in Bricklyn. Do you believe that coexistence of croissants and donuts is possible?
Patsy: My beignets au cidre de pomme, which are baked rather than fried, demonstrate that croissant and doughnut lovers can more than just coexist, then can live happily together!
Bricklyn Eagle: So apparently, Just as the farmer and the cowman should be friends, so should the doughnut and the croissant lover!📍 What a delightful note to end our conversation on. Best wishes, Patsy, for your success, and we look forward to your opening this Spring. ✥
📍Note from Gloria: I just couldn’t resist that allusion to one of my favorite musical numbers. If you haven’t heard it in a while, take a listen!
➤ If readers have any questions or comments about Pastries by Patsy, please email us and we will forward them on to Patsy.
by Samantha B. Fortune, Bricklyn Eagle Health & Science Reporter & David Plater Blue, Metro Desk Reporter
Showcasing an imposing BASA BrickR-4 rocket,📍 Bricklyn’s new Space Flight Park has opened to the delight of many Bricklynites.
📍 BASA is the Bricklyn Aeronautics & Space Administration, comparable to America’s NASA.
Bricklyn’s new Space Flight Park, located in the center of downtown, and surrounded by the buildings of Upper North, West, East, and South Streets.
The BASA BrickR-4 rocket, used in several 1990-era launches,📍 will serve a new mission: as the central attraction in the newly dedicated “Space Flight Park.”
📍Unknown to most, Bricklyn’s BASA BrickR-4 rocket’s design has — with adjustments for scale — been used as the model for NASA’s Space Launch System (SLS) rocket being used for the Artemis space missions. Unfortunately, NASA has not publicly credited BASA for its’ pioneering 1992 rocket design!
The BrickR-4 rocket displayed in Space Flight Park is no longer functional, and has been emptied of fuel and other equipment. But it still evokes memories of the salad days of Bricklyn’s space flight program, a program that, with the cooperation of the League of Inland Cities, also involved astronauts from three other Inland communities.
Space Flight Park: How the Pieces Came Together
Legotary President and High School History teacher Jerry Plater-Zybrick next to the BrickR-4 rocket at Space Flight Park.
Jerry Plater-Zybrick, head of the Legotary told the enthusiastic opening-day crowd that “Space Flight Park offers a dramatic, unique experience,” adding that “the Legotary is proud to have supported its assembly.”
The idea of restoring one of Bricklyn’s old rockets, and in the process creating a downtown park honoring Bricklyn’s space flight program, came from members of the Bricklyn Legotary.
Many in the community responded, helping the Legotary raise the funds needed to transport the giant rocket to its new home. Volunteers, including half a dozen members of the Bricklyn Laborers’ International Union, helped build a new gantry tower. The tower was closely modeled after the original gantry, unfortunately disassembled and discarded twenty years ago.
View of the newly assembled gantry tower. Volunteer construction workers donned space suits while working on the tower.
Winifred Tiler Jackson, Chief Historian of the Realm, noted that “it’s incredibly important that we preserve and celebrate key parts of Bricklyn’s history, and here we have one of the actual rockets used to send Bricklynites into space.”
As Tiler Jackson added, “the project is more than just a preservation project, it’s also a project that has built pride among Bricklynites in what our small Realm can accomplish when we pull together.”
Chamber of Commerce head Tom Brickorti stressed that the park would rapidly become a major attraction not just for Bricklynites, but for visitors, and noted that “the funds being put into developing the Park will be more than repaid by money spent in Bricklyn by new visitors who want to see our magnificent Space Flight Park.”
Planning Director Tim Brickedy.
City Planning Director Tim Brickedy and members of the Planning Commission were among the first to envision this novel park, recognizing it as a great fit for this long underutilized space in the heart of downtown.
Brickedy chuckled in recounting that, “some nearby residents and office workers thought we would be launching rockets from the middle of downtown, but we reassured everyone that the rocket on display would be fully decommissioned, and empty of fuel or any other equipment. It’s not going to be blasting off!”
To help implement the project, the Planning Commission last year recommended, and the Federal Council adopted, a zoning change that increased the maximum height of structures in the downtown district from 15 to 20 inches. This allowed for Space Flight Park to display a BrickR4 rocket which, along with its platform, comes to 19.5 inches in height.
Looking Back, But With Hope for the Future
Astronaut Sue Tiler Torres in her space suit, accompanied by her daughter Alicia on a rooftop overlooking the new Space Flight Park.
Posing beside one of the new signs for Space Flight Park we found Bricklyn Astronaut Sue Tiler Torres, with Alicia, her seven-year old daughter.📍
📍Sue Tiler Torres was one of the last group of three astronauts certified for flight in 2012. But none have yet been in space, as funding for the space program was slashed the following year. Only several unmanned flights took place between 2013 and 2018. Since then the Bricklyn space program has been on hold.
For Tiler Torres, the new Space Flight Park is “a hopeful step towards reviving the moribund Bricklyn space flight program.” As she adds: “When citizens of the Realm of Bricklyn, are so beautifully reminded of the wonders of space flight, and how much we accomplished just three decades ago, I hope they will support efforts to better fund our space flight program now.”
Alicia also had a few words to share with us: “The new park is so very cool. I love it! I’m going to be an astronaut like my Mom one day, and I’m going to go to the Moon!”
Rocket Moving Day Photos
Finally, credit is due to the Bricklyn Department of Public Works, and workers at the railyard, for helping in the complex, multi-stage move of the rocket and its boosters from the railyard to downtown.
Booster rocket leaves railyard en-route to its new home downtown.
Booster arrives downtown along West Street.
Crew off-loads the booster rocket near the entrance to Space Flight Park.
Reader Responses to this Story:
To the Editor: “I live in the third floor apartment on Upper North Street that is right next to the so-called Space Flight Park. This park will soon be a noisy hang-out for young people with nothing better to do day and night. Or even worse, it’ll be filled with that doomsday Preacher Johnny Kahn and his gang.
Will the police keep an eye on goings on in the park? Or will they just hang out at the police station eating donuts all day like my good-for-nothing son Homer? I bet we all know the answer to that question!” — Abraham Jebediah “Abe” Simpson II (Grampa Simpson)
To the Editor: “I take this occasion to congratulate the people of Bricklyn on their achievement in opening Space Flight Park. Folks, the story of Bricklyn is a story of progress and resilience. Of always moving forward. Of never, ever giving up. It’s a story unique among all LEGO nations. You are writing the next chapter in the great Bricklyn story.
When world leaders ask me to define Bricklyn, and they do, believe it or not, I say I can define it in one word, and I mean this: possibilities. Bricklynites, you don’t think anything is beyond your capacity. Everything is a possibility. You’ve proved it again today.”— U.S. President Joe Biden
To the Editor: “Very interesting that letter from U.S. President Joe Biden you received. Sounded a bit familiar to those of us who sat in The Excchange building connected to the Outland Internet watching him give his “State of the Union” address. Say it ain’t so, Joe!” — John Tiler Quincy, South Bricklyn, VT
