Note from the Editor: Thanks to several Bricklyn Eagle readers who alerted us to this frightening recent event reported in The New York Times: the abduction and beheading of LEGO people! The following post was prepared by Bricklyn Eagle Politics & Law reporter Mark Tiler Richmond & Outland Affairs reporter Duane Sandville.
Given the disturbing nature of some of its content, we urge readers to view the article first before allowing any children access to it.
➤ The Bricklyn Border Patrol, along with the Realm’s Bureau of Outland Affairs, have also heard concerning online chatter about plans of several groups of Outlanders to unlawfully enter Bricklyn for the purpose of abducting, and possibly beheading, citizens of the Realm of Bricklyn.
Guillaume de Bricklain, Secretary of the Bricklyn Dept. of Outland Affairs. Photo by Bricklyn Eagle’s Ann Tiler Anderson, with assistance from Dall E-3 AI.
Even more alarming are indications from unnamed sources in the U.S. Department of State that Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) agents may have been be involved with planning the abduction of scores of Bricklynites, even though Bricklyn is now a part of the French Republic.
It is also unclear from our sources whether or not this operation was being planned as an authorized ICE action, or by rogue agents.
Bricklyn ‘s Department of Outland Affairs this morning lodged a formal complaint with the U.S. Department of State, and demanded a response.
Sources in the administration of Vermont Governor Phil Scott have indicated that the State of Vermont will also be requesting a response from the State Department, as Vermont has retained extremely positive relations with the Realm of Bricklyn — relations that date back to the American Revolutionary War when many “Little Vermonters,” as Bricklynites were then called, joined Ethan Allen’s Green Mountain Boys to take up arms against the British.
Photo of Manuel Valls from The Bricklyn Eagle archives.
Also, in a statement just issued by French Minister of the Overseas Manuel Valls, France has pledged to send an airborne regiment of the French Legion “to counter any effort of groups of people — whether acting on their own or as agents of a foreign government — to unlawfully enter the Realm of Bricklyn and threaten any of its inhabitants.”
A spokesperson for the U.S. State Department this morning told members of the press that she could not comment on the abduction plan allegations, noting only that:
“While we are looking into the matter, it is hard to give credence to Bricklyn officials who are themselves undocumented migrants living in a small portion of the State of Vermont, which remains an integral part of the territory of the United States. Vermont public officials should take care not take potentially treasonous actions by attempting to block access of any officials or agents of the American government to any land or persons found within the so-called Tri-Partite Realm of Bricklyn, Vermont.”
The State Department spokesperson also issued a threat to the French government, warning that “we give absolutely no validity to France’s purported action of incorporating this tiny plot of land called Bricklyn into the French Republic. Despite its small size, this land remains an integral part of the United States. The French should beware of provoking us, and also look to their own sad track record as a so-called colonial power. Maybe their future should be as our 52nd state — after Canada becomes our 51st.”
For now, Bricklyn officials are urging residents to stay calm, but alert, and immediately report any concerning activity to either the Bricklyn Bureau of Outland Affairs or the Bricklyn Border Patrol. ✥
Bricklynites staying calm at The Bricklyn Tavern this evening. Photo by Ann Tiler Anderson, with assistance of Chat GPT 4.o
To the Editor: I did not realize LEGO people (minifigs) could be decapitated. I read a while ago an article in your paper about Bricklyn teens engage in “dare the train” games in order to have their heads “popped off” when they are struck by a passenger train, and that you have an EMT crew prepared to pop their heads back on without much of a problem. Can you explain the difference? — Maryann B., Portland, Maine
Reply from the Editor: Yes, this can be confusing, especially since we don’t know all the details of the California incident which — as far as we know right now — involved permanently severing the head from the body by cutting through the plastic sheathing that connects the head to the body. This is a far deeper “injury” than simply popping off a head and then reconnecting it.
Another factor is the length of time that the head has been removed. Once more than 24 hours has passed there will be severe cerebral damage after the head is reconnected, even if it was simply popped off. We don’t know for certain the amount of time the heads were removed from the California minifigs. Even a highly skilled surgeon would not be able to change that outcome once a full day has passed.
In Bricklyn when a teen’s head is popped off by an oncoming Brickstar train, an emergency medical team is on the scene within just five to ten minutes, and they are on call 24/7. After the EMT’s head chief pops the head back on, only a mild headache usually results. For more on this, see our post on rail-related head pop-offs.
To the Editor: It is shocking to think that American officials would support the abduction of scores of Bricklynites by criminal gangs or (worse) by agents of the federal government. The vast majority of Bricklynites are good, hardworking, family people. Hundreds of thousands of LEGO people like them have found homes in the playrooms of countless American families in every state of the Union. Have they not also earned the right to a small piece of land (just 250 acres) of their own in Bricklyn, Vermont? We need to do everything in our power to support their safety, not threaten it. — Sylvia N., Vermont
by Gloria Vanderbrick, Bricklyn Eagle “People in the News” correspondent
“What’s the weather like today?” That’s the question asked by most Bricklynites every day. We dare say, it’s the same question most Outlanders also ask.
Bricklyn weather forecasters, however, have the unusual task of having to deal with two totally different “climate zones” — depending on which side of The Great Wall of Bricklyn you live on.
Here to explain the ins and outs of the tricky job of forecasting the weather in the Realm of Bricklyn is chief meteorologist Tiler Brickoski, who works for the Bricklyn Weather Service — and who many Bricklynites see almost every day on NewsChannel5.
Tiler Brickoski on the air with NewsChannel 5 on a snowy day in Bricklyn Jct. .All photos in this article taken by Bricklyn Eagle photographer Ann Tiler Anderson, with assistance from Dall E-3 AI.
There’s one more reason Tiler is with us, and that’s because he’s a past Brickardy winner– but more on that after we talk about just about everyone’s favorite topic here in Bricklyn, the weather. Welcome Tiler.
Tiler Brickoski: Thanks, Gloria. Glad to be here, and I have to tell you I enjoyed your interview of fellow Brickardy winner, Merry Days. Her Bricklyn Brick Spa is my go to place whenever I need a thorough cleansing!
Weather Patterns Inside & Outside The Great Wall
Gloria Vanderbrick: Good to have you with us. Let’s start with what probably puzzles most Outlanders, and even some Bricklynites: just why are there two distinct climate zones in such a small geographic area as the Realm Bricklyn?
Tiler Brickoski: It has little to due with geography, since all of the Realm is quite similar in terms of topography. But what does make a huge difference — and why we always have to issue two sets of forecasts — is because of The Great Wall of Bricklyn. Those living in portions of Bricklyn “inside” The Great Wall are subject to completely different weather than those living “outside” The Great Wall.
Gloria Vanderbrick; We’re inserting below a photo showing the difference. Bear in mind that the photo was taken on a snowy Winter day (February 14, 2024, 1pm EST). You can see The Great Wall cutting through the middle of the yards facing each other: nice weather on the west side of The Wall, snow on the east side.
Same time, same February day: two sides of the same block in Bricklyn’s Eastside neighborhood looking west towards Bricklyn Bay. Photo by Ann Tiler Anderson, with assistance from Dall E-3 AI.
Tiler Brickoski: Yes, it’s a strange phenomenon, which can be especially disorienting in Winter when it’s almost always temperate inside The Great Wall, but cold and snowy outside the Wall — even though the Wall is only about six feet wide.
The Great Wall does not in any significant way affect the ability of Bricklynites to easily go back and forth between either side of The Wall. It can be fun to walk, in just a couple of minutes, from a snowy to a sunny day, or vice-versa. Kids of all ages enjoy that!
I should add that it can be confusing for Outlanders to understand the difference between “outside” or “inside” the Wall. But it’s actually simple:
“Outside The Great Wall” refers to those areas that cannot be seen by humans (other than in photos) since The Great Wall hides them from human sight, but leaves these parts of the Realm of Bricklyn subject to Vermont’s highly variable, seasonal weather.
Boys heading from house inside the Great Wall on a December morning to do some cross-country skiing a few blocks away in part of Bricklyn that is outside the Great Wall.
“Inside The Great Wall” refers to those parts of the Realm of Bricklyn that humans, that is to say Outlanders, can visit and see.
Those areas inside the Wall are all located in an enclave within an Outlander’s basement. As a result of this protective bubble, It never snows or rains in those parts of Bricklyn inside the Great Wall.
Photos above show two tunnels through The Great Wall, in both cases the view is from the downtown Bricklyn “inside the Wall” side. The other end of the tunnels is in Bricklyn Junction on the “outside the Wall” side. Photos by Ann Tiler Anderson, with assistance from Dall E-3 AI.
Gloria Vanderbrick: So what difference does that mean in terms of weather if you live inside or outside the Wall?
Tiler Brickoski: Well, generally speaking, weather outside The Great Wall is the same as the weather outdoors in Burlington, Vermont, while weather inside The Great Wall is the same as what it’s like inside the Outlander’s basement.
But here’s the problem: the weather inside The Great Wall — and this includes all of Bricklyn’s downtown core and part of South Bricklyn — is subject to the “whims” of that “unknown” Outlander who owns and controls the basement in which a large portion of the Realm of Bricklyn is located.📍
📍Editor’s Note: The 1981 establishment agreement between the State of Vermont and the Realm of Bricklyn formally recognized the Realm of Bricklyn’s existence as a quarter-acre enclave within the State of Vermont, The specific location, as well as the name of the homeowner who has provided the enclave cannot be disclosed without the express written consent of the homeowner. There are steep penalties for unauthorized disclosure, including banishment from Bricklyn.
Gloria Vanderbrick: Why did you says “whims,” Tiler? Isn’t the climate in those parts of Bricklyn inside The Wall generally temperate and consistent year round?
Tiler Brickoski: Maybe the word “whim” wasn’t the right word to choose — and I’m glad you included the word “generally.” Indeed most of the time temperatures in areas located inside The Wall are consistently in the 62 to 65 degree F. range. These temperatures are maintained by the Outland homeowner’s furnace and air conditioning unit as well as the fact that the basement is partially sunk into the ground.
Portions of South Bricklyn are located inside an Outlander’s basement. Various elements of the basement’s heating and cooling systems create forecasting challenges for Bricklyn meteorologists.
However, there is some variability, especially when this Outlander is on vacation and significantly lowers the temperature inside the house — perhaps to save money, perhaps to believe his action helps fight global warming. This can cause a quite noticeable drop in downtown Bricklyn’s temperature of about six to eight degrees. Bricklyn meteorologists refer to these times as the “They’re Away Days.” Again, it’s hard to forecast since we at the Bricklyn Weather Service are not privy to the Outlanders vacation schedule. That’s one weather mystery!
Gloria Vanderbrick: Tiler, are there any other aspects of the weather in those parts of Bricklyn that are inside The Wall that are, shall we say, “Outlander dependent”?
Tiler Brickoski is certified accurate by the Bricklyn Meteorological Society (BMS).
Tiler Brickoski: Yes, in fact there are. They relate to both wind speed and wind direction.
First of all, easterly winds flow out of vents near the basement ceiling.
They generate warm breezes during Winter when the Outlander’s furnace is active, and cool breezes during Summer when the Outlander’s air conditioner is running.
There’s one further complication, and that has to do with the Outlander’s portable fan.
Gloria Vanderbrick: How does that fan complicate your forecasting?
Tiler Brickoski: The fan’s unpredictable usage, location, and speed can be quite baffling to our meteorologists. Frankly, we don’t understand why the Outland homeowner periodically shifts the location of this fan, and also why he sometimes goes days without running the fan, and then days when the fan is always on.
Fan pointing northFan pointing east
Further complicating our forecasting ability, the homeowner seems to randomly change the fan’s “rotation” setting. This means that while sometimes the fan-generated wind blows steadily in just one direction, other times it moves in a broad, semi-circular constantly repeating pattern. Bricklyn meteorologists refer to these winds blowing in continuously changing directions as the “Circular Variables.”
As if all this weren’t enough, this fan also generates three different wind speeds, which are not set in any pattern we can discern. As I said, it’s baffling. We’ve asked our liaison to the Outland world to look into this and speak with the homeowner, but we’ve been told to “not rock the boat.”
Gloria Vanderbrick: I can see how all this can make forecasting difficult. I also know that you closely monitor the weather in Burlington, Vermont. Can’t Bricklyn just rely on the human meteorologists in Burlington, like the eminent Tyler Jankoski, for forecasts affecting those portions of Bricklyn outside The Great Wall? After all, the weather there should be about the same as in Burlington.
Tiler Brickoski at Bricklyn Weather Service offices in Bricklyn Jct., Vermont.
Tiler Brickoski: Yes, we could. But then six of us, including me, might be out of our jobs!
But truly, Gloria, we at the Bricklyn Weather Service have always felt it important for Bricklyn to be able to take care of its own forecasting needs. Given some of the concerns about possible changes in the relationship between Bricklyn and Vermont — the latter being part of the United States — I think being self-reliant remains a good practice.
Brickardy Advice from Brickoski
Gloria Vanderbrick: In our last few minutes I’d like to switch gears and ask you about another aspect of your life, that involving the game show Brickardy. You’ve been a past contestant and a six game winner on Brickardy. What got you interested in that show?
Part of the set of Brickardy. A much younger Tiler Brickoski is seen in the middle.
Tiler Brickoski: Like Merry Gay — and, yes, I read your interview of her — I started watching Brickardy as a kid. I even used to go over to The Excchange LIbrary and use their VPN to watch games of the Outland show it’s based on, Jeopardy.
I guess you’d call me a nerd, especially in my teens. I also preferred science to sports, which is how I got addicted to learning about weather. So delving into aspects of weather and climate led me to want to learn a lot about many other subjects, especially in the sciences. Brickardy just seemed to tie together all kinds of knowledge.
Gloria Vanderbrick: As I asked Merry Days last week, let me ask you: if you had to give one tip to someone who wants to be a Brickardy winner, what would that be?
Tiler Brickoski: I saw Merry’s advice was to make better use of the buzzer. That’s certainly a good tip. But for me what’s most important is having prepared a game strategy. This means things like selecting categories wisely, understanding how Daily Doubles work, and making smart wagers on Final Brickardy.
Gloria Vanderbrick: Tiler, thanks for taking the time to speak with us, and see you on NewChannel5.
To the Editor: Thanks for the interview of my favorite TV weather person. Tiler Brickoski is just great, and is such a smart guy. I love the segments he sometimes does on “weather mysteries.” I also wasn’t aware there are so many different factors involving wind speed and direction in Bricklyn. It is a strange sensation to walk down South Street during those “circular variable” winds when they’re continuously changing direction. — Melissa Plater Grant, Bricklyn, VT.
The day it rained frogs in South Bricklyn (June 15, 1983). Photo from The Bricklyn Eagle archives, taken with assistance from Dall E-3 AI.
To the Editor: I’m a junior at Bricklyn University, where I’m majoring in physics, with a minor in meteorology. I remember a number of years ago when I was in 4th grade, Mr. Brickoski came to our class and gave a terrific talk about strange weather events in Bricklyn’s history, like the time it actually rained frogs. Yes, it really can rain frogs! It was a lot of fun, and helped trigger my interest in meteorology.
But I also remember asking Mr. Brickoski why he was talking about the weather, instead of about meteors!He explained that the word “meteorology” comes from the Greek word “meteoron” which means “things high in the air” — and that includes the weather. — Moses B. Strong, South Bricklyn, VT.
To the Editor: I think that you could have edited the interview better. At times it was hard to follow. My guess is that most Outland readers will be lost with all the” inside the wall” and “outside the wall” references. They cloud up the article. You should tell your readers to at least read the glossary entry about the Great Wall first, or read where Bricklyn’s chief historian gives a good summary of the Great Wall’s history. Editor Walt Brickman, you could have done better! — Wayne S., Vermont
by Gloria Vanderbrick, Bricklyn Eagle People in the News Correspondent
Introductory note from Bricklyn Eagle Editor Walt Brickman:
As we promised you, our highly capable People in the News correspondent Gloria Vanderbrick is interviewing nine past Brickardy contestants. They’re a cross-section of Bricklyn residents with a wide range of occupations, not celebrities like Federal Council President Hilma Plater Zybrick, or Dunk Them Donuts mogul Dave Tiler Broffman. Our aim in this is to give you, our Outland readers, a better feel for daily life in Bricklyn.
Today, we’re publishing the first of Vanderbrick’s nine interviews. Her conversation is with Meredith B. Days, manager of the Bricklyn Brick Spa.
On Peach Street in downtown Bricklyn Jct.Merrry B. Days scrubbing a client.
Meredith B. Days brushing a client with a specially designed circular motion hand brush. All photos in this article taken by Eagle photographer Ann Tiler Anderson, with assistance from Dall E-3 AI.
By an interesting coincidence, we recently reported on “Clean Day Bricklyn.” Just as Bricklyn’s streets and buildings periodically need to be cleaned washed and scrubbed, so too do the LEGO people who live here.
The Bricklyn Eagle Interviews Spa Manager & Former Brickardy Champ, Merry B. Days
Gloria Vanderbrick for The Bricklyn Eagle: Hi, Meredith. We’re glad to speak with you as both a past Brickardy champion, and as one the people in our Realm whose job is to keep Bricklynites sparkling clean.
Merry Days: Thanks, Gloria. I always love reading your columns for The Eagle. But please call me Merry Days. Not everyone is going to realize who I am if you use the name “Meredith.”
Gloria Vanderbrick: No problem. Well, let’s start by talking about your job, which is really quite fascinating. Then we can end with a couple of questions about your being on Brickardy.
Steps in the Cleaning Process at the Bricklyn Brick Spa
Gloria Vanderbrick: Let’s turn to your job. As everyone in Bricklyn knows, getting cleaned regularly is key to good health, as well as to looking attractive. A large number of Bricklynites now go to cleaning spas, such as yours, instead of trying to thoroughly clean themselves at home.
Can you tell us what the steps in the spa cleaning process are, especially for our Outland readers who aren’t as familiar with what Bricklyn spa workers do?
1. The Hot Tub
All photos in this article were taken by Bricklyn Eagle photographer Ann Tiler Anderson, with assistance from Dall E-3 AI. All LEGO individuals shown in this and other photos in this article have given us permission to use thåe photo(s).
Merry Days. Of course, Gloria. First of all, and I think most importantly, is creating a relaxing environment for our clients.
That’s why the first step on entering the Brick Spa is spending several minutes in one of our hot tubs. It’s a great way to unwind, especially for our many clients who come to the Brick Spa directly from work.
Gloria Vanderbrick: I could use one of those hot tubs right now! What’s next in your cleaning process?
2. The Sauna Room
Merry Days: Sometimes it’s a bit hard to move our clients out of the hot tub! But everyone loves the next stop, our sauna room. We use radiant heat. Usually clients stay here for just five minutes or so.
Again one of the main goals is relaxation, but the radiant heat also provides benefits such as improved circulation and relief from body aches — and, yes, LEGO people can have aches and pains!
3. The Scrubbing Room
After the sauna room, our clients head over to our scrubbing room. We use either a long flat brush or a circular motion brush. [See the photo of a circular brush near the start of this article]. Scrub brushing by hand is key to making sure all the dust and fine particles are removed from our clients’ bodies. In that photo below I’m in one of our scrubbing rooms with a client.
As an aside, I assume all your readers know that Bricklyn is located in an Outlander’s basement. Even though this Outlander — whose name I don’t know — does occasionally clean his basement, it’s not very thoroughly done. That’s one reason why Bricklynites need to take their own cleaning seriously. I strongly recommend that Bricklynites stop by a spa — whether ours or someone else’s — at least every other month. It’s really essential for good health and hygiene.
Gloria Vanderbrick: Thanks, Merry, for that suggestion. Full disclosure: I’ve been to your spa a number of times for cleanings, so I’m quite sure there are two more rooms left, right?
4. The Paint Coloring Room
Merry B. Days: That’s right, Gloria. The fourth step in the spa cleaning process is the magic of the paint coloring room.
Stylists at work in the Bricklyn Brick Spa
This is where our clients’ clothing and body colors get touched up. For an extra fee, they can get the color or style of their hair, or the patterns of their clothing, changed.
A growing number of Bricklynites have been asking for changes, sometimes making one or two changes each time they’re here! You know, some now like a change for every season.
Sometimes Bricklynites will splurge on new attire, or a change in hair style, for their birthday or anniversary, or even for their child’s high school prom or graduation.
Before on the lieft; after on the right. of each image.
Sometimes even the lyrics of a song can influence someone to want to change the color of their clothes. This was the case for an 18 year old young man who, after hearing this song, wanted to start wearing purple. With our equipment, repainting to a purple outfit (with some touches of white and blue) only took about ten minutes — and not a bad result I’d say!
Our stylists can offer suggestions, and — using our proprietary computer program — show our clients how changes they’re considering will look.
I should note that Brickcare insurance currently will cover the cost of modifications made during just one spa visit per year, so multiple modifications can get costly. I also need to add, for those who don’t know, that Bricklyn law prohibits spas from making any facial or skin color changes. This law has been challenged, but I’m not a lawyer and can’t really speak to that.
We use a special paint removal and application process to remove the old colors and then paint on the new colors. [See photo above]. As with our roller, the equipment we use was developed in coordination with LEGO master technicians.
Our stylists will then add, by hand, final touches to achieve just the final look the customer was hoping for.
A spa stylist using the newest variable pitch hair styling brush.
As you can imagine, paint coloring is often the most time-consuming part of the spa cleaning process. It also calls for skilled stylists.
We require all our stylists to have a certificate from the Bricklyn Health Department attesting to successful completion of BHD’s three month course in LEGO hair and clothing styles, and demonstrate complete knowledge of the LEGO color palette.
Our spa also has an additional three month apprenticeship requirement, during which our new stylists work under the direct supervision of a senior member of our team.
I should also point out that any Bricklynite 16 years of age or younger requires parental permission for a change of attire or hair style. We know that many young people find the age limit repressive or stifling of their identity, but that’s what the law requires. Our spa is also licensed by the Realm of Bricklyn to print out new identification cards for anyone changing their attire or the color or style of their hair.
5. The Polishing Room
Gloria Vanderbrick: We’re nearing the end of our tour.
Merry Days: Yes, Gloria. After having finished in the paint coloring room, our clients head over to their last stop, our polishing room. They lie down on an adjustable platform next to a large, but soft, specially designed spinning roller.
The roller is then lifted off its base and slowly moved over all of the body. It truly bring out the sheen in each Bricklynite’s plastic.
I do want to add that the roller we use has been developed by LEGO to ensure just the right amount of firmness, as we don’t want to mar our plastic-based bodies.
So that’s an overview of what we do at the Bricklyn Brick Spa. I should add that while I’ve worked at all stages of the cleaning process, I’m now one of the spa’s managers. I usually oversee our staff; work on training; and fill in when someone is out sick.
After Hours:
Gloria Vanderbrick: What do you like to do after work? Can i guess it has something to do with Brickardy?
Merry B. Days: You got it. When I’m done work I often head over to the public library and pull out a volume of the Bricklyn Encyclopedia to learn more about different aspects of Bricklyn, from literature to music, from geography to history.
Gloria Vanderbrick: What first got you interested in Brickardy?
Merry Days: When I was growing up, just about every evening my parents, and me and my older brother watched Brickardy. My brother used to get mad when I got more answers right than he did. From the start. Brickardy is great for people like me who love all sorts of topics — and there sure are plenty in the Bricklyn Encyclopedia!
Gloria Vanderbrick: If you had to give one tip to someone who wants to be a Brickardy winner, what would that be?
Merry Days: For me, it’s knowing when to buzz in. If you buzz before host Zen Brickthings finishes reading the clue, you’ll be locked out of buzzing again for a brief period. You need to be quick, but if you aren’t very sure of your answer, it’s better to hold off and let the other contestants buzz in first. A wrong answer can be costly, as it was on my final Brickardy appearance!
Gloria Vanderbrick: Thanks so much for the tour, Merry. But before I leave, I’d like to book my next appointment!
A smiling (and why not?) Bricklyn Eagle Editor Walt Brickman seen inside a one-person hot tub at the Bricklyn Brick Spa. Photo by Merry B. Days, with assistance from Dall E-3 AI. ✥
We welcome Letters to the Editor. How do your own experiences at spas compare to those described in Vanderbrick’s interview? Please email to: bricklynvt@gmail.com
To the Editor: The Pastries by Patsy team has arranged for reciprocal discounts with the Bricklyn Brick Spa. In fact, Pastries by Patsy has recently expanded its product line to include freshly made vegetable juices, rich in electrolytes, which are essential when using the infrared sauna. Look forward to seeing Bricklynites at our café for some pre- or post- spa beverages. — Patsy Brickerson, Bricklyn, VT.
