December 29, 2024
by David Tiler Blue, Metro Desk Reporter
Just three days after we reported on the donut-filled celebration of the “Simpsons 5th Anniversary in Bricklyn,” The Bricklyn Eagle has learned of a “nuclear power plant agreement” between several of the Simpsons’ principals and the Realm of Bricklyn. The previously unpublicized agreement links the Simpsons’ December 2019 move to Bricklyn with the Realm’s approval of a nuclear power plant in Bricklyn.
This quid pro quo became public when an entity called “Nu-Clear Bricklyn” filed a legal complaint in Bricklyn Superior Court yesterday. The complaint requests the Court to “order the Realm of Bricklyn to issue no later than January 27, 2025 a license permitting construction of a nuclear power plant on the site of Bricklyn’s Riverside Park and Fairgrounds.” This would be Bricklyn’s first nuclear power plant.
The Bricklyn Eagle has obtained a copy of the document underlying the complaint. It is titled “Agreement for Simpsons & Friends Relocation to Bricklyn,” and is dated January 5, 2019.
In the agreement, the principals for Nu-Clear Bricklyn are listed as: C. Montgomery Burns, CEO; Waylon J. Smithers, Jr., Secretary; and David Tiler Broffman, CFO.
The signatory for the Realm of Bricklyn is listed as (then) Yuppie- Mayor-King Spiro Brickburger.
Of particular interest are the following paragraphs of the January 2019 Agreement:
“In consideration for Mr. Burns’ and Mr. Smithers’ vital assistance in relocating the Simpson family and friends from Springfield to the Realm of Bricklyn, VT, an event to occur no later than December 31, 2019, the Realm of Bricklyn, VT, agrees to take all necessary steps no later than December 21, 2024 to approve the construction of a nuclear power plant owned and operated by Nu-Clear Bricklyn to be located along the Brickooski River at the sites of what are known as The Fairgrounds and adjoining Riverside Park.
Failure of the Realm of Bricklyn to grant such approval by December 21, 2024 shall be deemed a breach of this relocation agreement, and the Realm of Bricklyn shall be liable for the expense of returning the Simpson family and their related clan to Springfield, while also paying to Mr. Burns and Mr. Broffman a penalty of $2 million dollars (U.S.) each, and $1 million dollars (U.S.) to Mr. Smithers.”
Nu-Clear Bricklyn has requested the Court to either compel the Realm of Bricklyn to issue a permit to construct the power plant, or require the Realm to pay for the Simpson clan’s re-location to Springfield, as well as awarding damages totaling $5 million dollars (U.S.) to the three principals of Nu-Clear Bricklyn.
The Bricklyn Eagle sought comment from Nu-Clear Bricklyn, as well as from former YMK, Spiro Brickburger.
A spokesperson for Nu-Clear said that “Nu-Clear complied with all legal requirements, as we will clearly demonstrate in Superior Court. The fact that there was a quid-pro-quo for the Simpsons’ move from Springfield to Bricklyn is a normal part of business practices. What’s more, Bricklyn would greatly benefit from being able to rely on its own power source, not on the whims of Outlanders. Nuclear has a proven track record in other Inland Realms. These are facts, not fiction.”
In a brief statement to the press from his retirement home on Lake Bricklyn, former Yuppie-Mayor-King (YMK) Brickburger said, “I’ve always acted in the best interests of the Realm of Bricklyn. That will be shown here. People forget that the position of King comes with the inherent power to act in the in the peoples’ best interests, that’s part of the royal prerogative.”
The Bricklyn Eagle also received the following statement from Federal Council President Hilma Plater-Zybrick:
“I was shocked to learn this morning that there was a secret agreement apparently signed by former YMK, Spiro Brickburger that purportedly authorizes the construction of a nuclear power plant at the site of the Fairgrounds and Riverside Park.
“While this action may have technically been within the scope of YMK Brickburger’s authority as King — and I emphasize the word “may” — the Federal Council, of which I was then a member, was never informed that the 2019 relocation of the Simpsons to Bricklyn was to be conditioned on approval of the construction of a nuclear power plant.”
As Council President Plater-Zybrick’s statement continues:
“I was dismayed to learn that Dunk Them Donuts CEO David Tiler Broffman is one of the principals of Nu-Clear Bricklyn, the company that will purportedly own and operate this facility.
“I am also concerned about the role Federal Chancellor Thurnbrick may have played in this affair, and have requested his presence at a special meeting of the Federal Council next week.
“I can promise the citizens of Bricklyn three things: first, that the Federal Council will fully investigate what has transpired, second, that Riverside Park and The Fairgrounds will remain publicly owned and accessible, and not be the site of any power plant; and third, that no nuclear plant will be constructed anywhere within the Realm of Bricklyn until after full public hearings and approval by the Federal Council.”
Apparently over the past several months there have been behind the scenes negotiations between Nu-Clear Bricklyn and the Federal Chancellor’s office. Why the Federal Council was apparently not included in, or informed of, these talks is not yet clear.
The Bricklyn Eagle will continue to monitor this breaking news story.
Update: March 7, 2025: The Federal Council announced an agreement with Nu-Clear Bricklyn that Nu-Clear will cease all efforts to construct a nuclear power plant in Bricklyn (at least until January 1, 2027), and will drop its current lawsuit against the Realm of Bricklyn, while the Realm of Bricklyn agrees not to initiate any lawsuit against Nu-Clear Bricklyn or its principals related to their efforts to construct a nuclear power plant at the Riverside Park / Fairgrounds location.
We welcome Letters to the Editor. Please email to: bricklynvt@gmail.com
To the Editor: Is our government a circus, or what? Left hand doesn’t know what the right hand is doing. Doesn’t Ms. Plater-Zybrick, our supposedly “on top of everything” Federal Council President communicate regularly with Federal Chancellor Thurnbrick? What has he been up to in all this? Was he in on this deal?? And talking about circuses, where is the Barnum & Bricklyn Circus going to set up their tents if the Fairgrounds is used for a nuclear power plant?? — Alan Brickstein, Bricklyn, VT
To the Editor: I’m the Outland homeowner who leases to the Realm of Bricklyn space in my basement (plus .2 acres of my back yard) to house the Tripartite Realm of Bricklyn, VT. I was as shocked as anyone to read in today’s Bricklyn Eagle about this nuclear power plant deal.
Believe me, I’ve already contacted attorneys — both in Vermont and in Bricklyn — about how this so-called agreement violates the terms of the lease I agreed to offer the Realm of Bricklyn. No way I’m having radioactive materials in my basement! All I can say right now to the folks at Nu-Clear Bricklyn is “See You In Court!” — Name withheld, South Burlington, VT.
Reply from the Editor: In keeping with Bricklyn law, we are not authorized to disclose the name of the above letter writer, who is the lessor of the space on which the Realm of Bricklyn is located.